I'm Ron Burgundy?

Ha ha. Do you remember that time when you stopped the car you were riding in to yell at me for smoking. I was what like 14 then? Man were you pissed to see me do what you wished I never would. You yelled at me and made me look like an ass to all my friends in my foolish attempt to look cool. I wish you knew a better way back then to be a big brother then being an ass but that was how you were and leading a double life was how I was. You never told mom or dad about that even though I gave you the middle finger when you drove away. Oh yeah then you saw me in the rear view and stopped the car to give me another piece of big brother love. fuck I look back and think how funny that was and yea still think you were an ass. You love me too much for your own good. You were always the cooler smoother version of what I always wanted to be. All I ever felt around you was fat and clumsy. Its funny to think about those times now cause I usually had no idea why you were the way you were. Rob left when you were what 13? I was 9? All those time are so fuzzy, were you just trying to be the best brother you knew how? I know if I had a little brother I would do a better job then both of you cause you always do better when someone else shows you how to do it. Did you ever know I attribute most of my parenting to you? Everyone else seems to think I got all kinds of attention that I can never remember getting. It seemed like the only attention I ever got was from you whether it was bad or good it was still attention. You were the cloth from which I was cut. You fashioned the majority of my habits and disposition. You are my doctor frankenstein. Ever thought about that? Did you know I always envy you? In your mind you are something totally different then what you are to me. You were always the last person I ever want to stab and the first person I drew the knife on. You are not just a brother you are a father figure to me, a Darth Vader kind but one never the less. Ever thought that you were the person I followed my whole life? You and your wife have been together for 12 years. You and I have been around for about 20. She still has the better part of a decade to get out of the way before she can start to match years with me. The only person I will have spent more time with by the time we are laid to rest in our graves other then you is my wife. I have been with you like a child who will not go away. You are my brother in blood and that will never change. I love you till death brings us home again. Please forgive me.