speak up...

I can feel all of you lurking just behind my eyes. I wonder where all of you are at and if you can feel me too. I can hear you echo my quesitons in your own minds but I dont know why. If your out there speak up, if you looking for me like I know I am passively looking for all of you please find me. We are all apart of the same purpose and one day we will meet and begin the end.

between sleep and awake...

there is a rumor of a man...
of a myth or a legend and man so great that he can create and destroy and he holds our fate in his hands. a leader who can discern and is uncorruptable and man who is from where i am from but not of what i am. he a great man and he is who i am waiting to follow. he is strong and wise compassionate but discplined. he is decisive and always right but he is not perfect. he is above reproach and better then all of us combined. he can call the winds because he knows why they blow. he can calm the waves because he knows what makes them restless. He brought light to the depths because he wanted the depths to know he cares. He spoke to the restless souls and gave them rest. He is the one i wait for. he is coming and i can hear him calling.

The nemesis awaits....
there is a thing that lurks and I see his shadow from the corner of my eye. he is sitting in the corner with the horrors of this world waiting for the fight to begin. dont take notice even if you see them that only brings their attention upon your head. they wrek disaster and ill thoughts in those who listen. they cloud the ether with their stench and rob the innocent of their breath. they walk in the place between fear and insanity along the corridors between darkness and grey...they are those who cannot rest and those who will not die they are those who bring nightmares and frost...they are the ones who have always been here and long to be somewhere else as well...they will fight one day but they will not fight without reason...

its nice to sit between sanity and sleeplessness

are you a dreamer...

I am the dreamer who never was
the only one to ever create a thought beyond my grasp
the one who does not belong and never will
I am the dreamer
can you hear them weeping
they are still alive
each one holding the blueprint of the whole
can you ever comprehend what its like
all your dreams broken
all my aspirations and exaltations crushed by the erosion of reality
how brutal and a painful it is to be the dreamer
without anything else to dream
the dreamer with no children to nurture
all I have is the shore i created and the ocean that feeds on it
my own little infinity ending a grain at a time

What's that sound...

Can you hear that sound
the whisper weeping coming from the shore
its the sound of broken dreams
dashed on the cliffs of reality

can you feel them when you walk on the sand
the millions of dreams that have been ground to dust
can you soak all the imagination up that you never had
can you hear them all weeping in unison

The harder you hold them the more they slip away
its because they are not yours to realize
they will never be more then food for the sea
they are not yours their mine you see

Worthless...

I am sad that intergrity is worthless. It should be a crime not to have it. I wish that it would benefit everyone when you have it but it does not. I remember when I lost my fear. I have always wanted to die but I never wanted to have it be premature, when ever it happens it just happens. I started praying for it when I lost my fear. I say fear but it really started out as self loathing. When my hate for me was only my fear of my own ability and strength I was set free and no longer afraid. I no longer fear and I am truly free for hate and I wish everyone else could take my journey.