The gold ring

I am turning the situations over and over in my head and I am growing quieter as the thoughts crowd my head. I am more then a little curious about how you plan on making your ammends with the dead. You cannot say goodbye to those that are gone but you also cannot wish well to those who do not believe in good. I am finding that all my questions come full circle and one has crept up on me again. In its resurfacing I find the path of those who were once strong and have grown weak. Yes when I rehashed this one I almost answered it differently then I have for so many years. I found the error and it pulled me out of my depressive state but nearly too late for any good to come from the answer.
I am glad to find you all well, though it has been so long since the last time I wrote. I begin writing again because as I see the road ahead I realize there is little to do but bite the bullet. I have no outlet that is sufficent other then this so I again must continue to write here. There are some of you I wish did not read this but I guess the wheel weaves as the wheel wills. I have, as I stated above, come out of about a month long funk of depression. I have encountered on the other side of this some younglings waiting to be taught. I dont want to teach but I have to wonder if I do not guide them down the path of my experience where will they go next for knowledge? I have been told that my mentality of "If not me then who?" is a bad one because it spreads me thin; Wears me down inside and out. I am again trying to add depth to my being by forcing my self to take on different routines. Changing up my days is already having its benefits. I think I am done for now.