To the reader...

Like a shotgun going off in a monastery I get my first and more then likely my last posted comment to one of my inane ramblings. I have to say its more then what I expected and I love feedback. Want know what it said then just read it but this is my thought.

To you my lonely soul who spends time reading my less then intimate thoughts I have this to say. You have never been a hero and on the off chance that you will be one some day don't be happy about it. All your hero's are fake and they never wanted what they got when they became a hero. I have been a hero since I was five and all I ever received from it was pain and ridicule. I don't say this as my little rant about how I am unappreciated I say it so that you know that no matter what my destiny is I can dream about the road not traveled. When you travel any road the other seems to be the more enticing. By nature you can never be happy as a hero because your life is one of torture and confusion. Every comic and movie and TV hero is portrayed that way at least once in their transparent fairy tale saga. All Superman wanted was to be normal and like everyone else but he could not help being himself. All Batman wanted was his parents back, he would have traded it all for that one selfish act to have his parents. Spiderman was miserable and a bit of an ass to everyone with his "witty" comments. He would have traded it all to lead a normal life with MaryJane but he could not. Hero's are the most selfish and selfless people in the world. To be content they must realize they are selfish and don't want what they have. They want less of what they have because their burden to bear is the burden of truth. They must face the truth of themselves and everyone else all at the same time. They are sub-human/super-human by all who know they are a hero by virtue of humanity. Nothing is perfect and hero's fall and when they make a mistake they don't just fall they are pulled down by those who were just looking up to them. They hit harder and break more completely then you or anyone else will ever know. A true hero never dies they just disappear because they cannot die. They always fall but that never kills them like normal people. It only servers to make them anew in the fire of adversity and when they do "die" someone dumbass decides to take up their burden and carry on the torch. So even in death as a hero you never die your life is just repeated in a different body. My lament is not in being a hero but more in knowing the truth. The truth is no one is innocent and not a single person deserves a hero or a savior. They are all as a whole ungrateful and as singular humans if judged by their actions and or intentions do not deserve much more then the whole. As a hero you lament your path yet walk or run it because of the most basic and selfish and selfless reason of all... You love everyone. You truly hate no one but your self and cannot imagine not serving others. Hero's always fall in love because they are made of the very substance and idealism that is love. They love humanity and humans; not for their crowning achievements and amazing feats as a race or as individuals but for their lowest and most despicable acts. If you truly love someone then you know what I am talking about. You reach the truth when you realize that someone is at their core a terrible person and yet you love them anyway and would still save their ass or chastise them properly when either is necessary. That is the truth that keeps hero's from dieing and that is what keeps a hero alive. Hate and love are apart of life but love is the only one that gets harder and harder to do as you get older. You can get angry at anyone in traffic but can you say you love them? A true hero knows from birth that they are a hero and that is unavoidable. They are humanitarians from the beginning in the truest sense of the word and they resolve to be so from a young age. That resolve is tempered through trial throughout their life. They all fall and fail themselves but they always resolve to do it better the next time.